Jennifer Blacklock

Labels can be so helpful. They can identify important aspects of our personalities and callings, making it easier to prioritize what’s important. Being an “intentional parent” will determine many decisions for how one spends their time. Being a “disciple of Jesus” will change the course of a person’s life. Even a label as simple as “athletic” or “crunchy” can have a significant impact for the positive.

However, there are three ways I’ve been thinking about that labels can be dangerous.

One is in labeling others, especially children. Labels create identity, whether intentional or not. This can be a great thing- we should be speaking into the people God has put in our lives, especially our children. But if not careful and God-led, people can offer identities that are harmful or untrue. The teenager who’s been given free range to an addictive smart phone and is now “always on his phone”. The imaginative or meticulous kid becomes the “slow kid”. The one who has perfectionistic tendencies and takes things seriously becomes the “over-achiever”. Even seemingly really good labels— the “smart kid”, the “good-at-everything kid”— these things can come to define a person. Certain labels can put a lot of pressure on people (“the friend who always says yes”) or distract from priorities, callings, or even personality traits that God would have for them.

Another potential danger is that of hypocrisy that comes when a label is false or becomes a burden, but because of pride or need for approval, is covered up. The “screen-free mom” who becomes addicted to her smartphone but won’t ask for accountability. The “health nut” who lives a secret life of binging on junk food. This often comes from a feeling of inability to measure up to expectations. The sad thing is that many times the expectations are ones people have made for themselves. When I was a vegetarian, I wouldn’t even cave to eat meat when I desperately craved it while pregnant. I had created this idea in my mind that I would be a failure. Though I remained (needlessly) firm in my stance as a vegetarian, I could have easily fallen into hypocrisy by eating meat but continuing to call myself a vegetarian for the sake of pride in the label.

The third concern with labels is the potential for them to become excuses for negative behavior. The “introvert” won’t go to family functions or won’t share their faith in Jesus. The “laid back guy” who refuses to take important things seriously. The “emotionally healthy/going-to-therapy” person who uses it as an excuse to cut people out of their lives rather than forgiving. The “fun girl” who can’t leave her circle of friends and lifestyle of partying even when convicted to. When labels become excuses to do something we know we shouldn’t or not do something we know we should, that’s a big problem. Maintaining a certain label is not of utmost importance. We should be always changing, always growing.

Which of these three is of most concern to you? Let me know in the comments!